The BSD Benevolent Dictator For Life? Nobody. The BSD world has been fragmented since the 1980s at least; even before the proliferation of Open Source BSDs, there was a little tribe of closed-source BSDs being sold by workstation manufacturers and going up against the similarly closed-source System V OSes to be King of All Unix.
I suppose my point is the BSD universe long predates the modern concept of Open Source and, therefore, a lot of the current practices surrounding Open Source software.
The free/net/open/dragonfly forks may all be interesting, but they fragmented the community. I'd blame the lack of a single strong leadership.